In this Post, you will read an Persuasive Jealousy Essay. Its a human attribute. Also you will know its definition, causes, effects and handeling techniques.
So, lets understant Jealousy…
Definition of Jealousy
Jealousy is defined as a complex emotion that includes feelings, from fear of abandonment to rage and humiliation. It hits people of all ages, sexes and sexual orientation, and most often wakes up when a person perceives a threat to a valuable relationship from a third party. The danger can be real or imagined.
Nobody likes to be jealous. However, jealousy is an unavoidable emotion that most of us experience. The problem with suspicion is not that it occurs occasionally, but what it does to us when we don’t catch it.
The experience of what happens when jealousy overpowers us or shapes the way we feel about ourselves and the world can be frightening. There must understand where the resentments come and how should deal it in a healthy, adaptive way in many areas of our lives like interpersonal relationships, through careers to personal goals.
Causes and Types of Jealousy
Studies have shown that larger jealousy correlates with smaller self-esteem. “Many of us are often ignorant of the rudimentary disgrace that lives in us because it routinely arrives at considering us self-critically. The shame in our past can strongly affect the extent to which we feel jealous and uncertain in the present.
Dr. Lisa Firestone, author of “Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice,” define, “critical inner voice” is a form of harmful speech. It consolidates destructive thoughts and feelings, forcing us to compare, evaluate, and judge ourselves (and often others) with high accuracy. This is one reason learning to deal with jealousy is such impacts.
This voice can fuel our sense of jealousy, filling our heads with critical and suspicious commentary. What are the compelling inner views tells us that our situation is often harder to bear itself?
Our partner’s rejection or betrayal is painful, but what often hurt us is all the terrible things that remember about ourselves after this event. “You are such a fool. Did you think you could be happy? – You’ll finish yourself. You should never faith anyone again. “
To illustrate how this internal enemy feeds our negative feelings about jealousy, we’ll look closely at two types of envy: romantic resentment and competitive jealousy.
Although these two forms of jealousy often overlap. Considering them can help us better understand how they affect different areas of our lives and how to best cope with it.
The fundamental reality is to ease relationships when people don’t get too jealous. The more we can master our sense of resentment and distinguish it from our partner, the better. Remember that our jealousy often comes from uncertainty within ourselves.
The feeling we are condemned to cheating, hurting, or rejecting. Unless we can handle this feeling within ourselves, we will probably fall victim to feelings of jealousy, distrust, or uncertainty in any relationship, regardless of the circumstances.
Although it may seem pointless or illogical, it is natural to want what others have and to feel competitive. However, the way we use these sentiments is essential for our grade of approval and happiness.
If we use these sentiments to assist our inner critic, demolish ourselves or others, this is a destructive pattern with demoralizing effects. However, if we do not let these feelings fall into the hands of our critical inner voice, we can use them to recognize what we want.
Some more reasons of Jealousy
These negative feelings about us come from early experiences in our lives. We often accept the feelings that our parents or important guardians had towards us or each other. Then, unconsciously, we recreate or react to the old, known dynamics in our relationships.
For example, if we felt rejected as children, we can easily see our partner as ignoring us. We can choose a partner who is more elusive or even engages in behaviors that would push our partner away.
However, regardless of our unique experience, we all have this internal critic to some extent. The area to which this fear effects, how threatened we would explore in a relationship. Like a sadistic trainer, our critical inner voice tells us not to trust or be too sensitive.
It reminds us we are unloved and we don’t feel like having an affair. This whisper plants the seeds of doubt, suspicion, and uncertainty. “Why does she work late?” “Why does she choose her friends before me?” “What does she even do when I’m away?” “Why does he pay so much attention to what he says?”
Those of us, well renowned with how jealousy works, understand that all too often these ideas will gradually sprout and bloom into much larger, more in-depth attacks on ourselves and/or our partner.
“She doesn’t want to be with you. There must be someone else. – He’s losing interest. I want to break free from you. – Who would listen to you? You are so boring.
Effects of Jealousy
It is okay, even healthy, to afford a competitive thought. It may feel good when we allow ourselves to feel temporarily without judgment or an action plan. However, if we think or turn this thought into self-criticism or an attack on another person, we will be hurt. If we feel overreaction or jealousy, we can do a few things.
Think about specific events that make you feel agitated. Is this a friend financially successful? A former dating someone else? A colleague who speaks at meetings?
Ask yourself what critical internal voices appear. What thoughts evoke these jealous feelings? Do you use these feelings of jealousy to put off?
Do they make you feel insignificant, unsuccessful, incapable, etc.? Is there a pattern or motif in these thoughts that seem familiar?
Think about the more profound implications and beginnings of these thoughts: Do you feel some pressure to achieve a particular thing? Should you be something? What would this mean for you? Is this related to your past?
We can have more compassion for us and trial to hover judgments that lead us to insecurity.
How to deal with jealousy?
1. Think about what is waking up?
Daniel Siegel applies the acronym SIFT to explain how we can move the impressions, feelings, images, and thoughts that arise when we think about specific problems in our lives. We should try to do it when we feel jealous.
We can think about what feelings, pictures, and thoughts arouse. Does the scenario release something old – a dynamic or long-term negative self-perception?
The more we can combine these emotions or exaggerated reactions with the past events that created them, the more we can feel in our jealous situation.
2. Calm down and remain vulnerable
No matter how jealous we are, we can recover and relax. It can do this first by acknowledging our strong sentiments with compassion. Remember that no issue how powerful seem, our feelings overtake in waves, the first building, and then falling.
It is possible to accept and recognize our jealousy without acting on others. We can learn tools to calm down before the reaction, for example, a walk or deep breaths.
It is much easier to calm down in this way when we refuse to indulge in the angry words of our internal critic. So it is necessary to learn how to do it. When we do this, we can defend ourselves and the people we care about, remain sensitive and open in our relationships.
3. Don’t react
Our critical inner voice advises us to take actions that can hurt us in the long run. When it makes us jealous, it can tell us to give up or stop pursuing what we want. This can lead to self-protection, blow up, or punish someone whom we hate.
If we’re in a relationship, it can tell us to be icy or hit our partner. When we do this, we create the dynamics fear. We can hurt and undermine our partners’ feelings for us and arouse their feelings of distrust.
We may unwittingly encourage them to become more closed, less open to their feelings, thoughts, and actions, which then increases our feelings of suspicion and jealousy.
4. Look for your sense of security
The best it can do is control on feeling stable and secure within ourself. We must do the work to beat our internal jealous thoughts.
Criticize and believe that everything is excellent, even alone. We don’t need the love of a particular person to think that we’re loved. People are full of flaws and limitations, and no one can give us what we need 100 percent of the time.
That is why it is essential to practice compassion and learn how to oppose our internal critic. This does not mean closing people or cutting off what we want.
It means embracing our lives with all our heart while being convinced that we are strong enough to fail or lose. Regardless of everything, we can handle emerging emotions.
5. Stay competitive
Many people don’t agree with competing, but it’s not about being the best, but about your personal goal to be the best. This means we feel ourselves and accept the qualities that will serve us in pursuing what we want.
If we wish to respect us, we must be attentive and thoughtful in our interactions. If we feel the consistent love of our partner, we must commit to engaging in love deeds every day. If we keep our desire to act honestly and follow our goals, we win the most crucial battle we face
6. Unload your sorrows
When something like jealousy takes control, it’s essential to find the right person to talk and a healthy way of expressing what we feel. People who support us positively and help to stop us from chewing or deeply immersed in our sorrows are friends with whom we want to talk about our jealousy.
We all have friends who are a little too tired when we talk about specific topics, and may not be the best friends to look for when we feel aroused and nervous. It should try to find people who will support us, staying on the right path, and being the people we want to be.
Giving up to these friends is fine as far as releasing our irrational thoughts and feelings while acknowledging that they are exaggerated and ridiculous. This process works when it frees us from feelings and allows us to go further and take reasonable actions. If you are jealous, it is wise to seek help from a therapist. It will help us understand our feelings and control them,
In a relationship, maintain open, honest communication with our partner. If we hope they will trust them and that they will have ours, we must listen to what they say without defending ourselves or giving judgment.
This open communication is not about releasing our uncertainty on our partner, but about enabling ourselves to be friendly and connected, even when we feel insecure or jealous. This helps our partner do the same.
You need some emotional maturity to deal with many feelings around jealousy. We need to face our critical internal voice and any uncertainties it generates. You also need the willpower to step back and resist our impulsive, jealous reactions.
However, when we support this power ourselves, we realize that we are much stronger than we think. By discovering how to deal with jealousy, we become more protected in us and our relationships.